Waves and Tides by David Hasbury

(Introduction to "Dolphins and Dreamcatchers")

In February of 1996 I stood on China Beach on the west coast of Vancouver Island. It was a cool winter day but the sun was shining through the clouds. I was all alone on the beach. The waves were gently hitting the shore, one after the other, a rhythm not unlike gentle breathing. I walked along the shore focused on the beach looking for stones that would catch my eye. All of the stones were wonderfully smooth, shaped and polished by the flow of water that the waves and tides had washed over them.

I spent most of the day there, listening to the waves, soaking up the sun, looking for stones and watching the ocean ... and breathing. As the day wore on, in the distance to the south, a huge deep charcoal darkness was forming. The sky was slowly filling with cloud, the sun had less room to break through. Far off shore underneath the storm clouds I could see the shape of the waves changing. These same waves that were gently breathing on the shore were now rising, their caps were white, they were taller and bigger, yet the sounds of the shore in front of me remained the same.

The ocean is so large that I could watch all of this forming before my eyes yet it would be hours before the storm reached my shore. But I could see how all of the same ingredients, water, wind, cloud, sun could change shape and the balance shift. This scene became a wonderful metaphor of life. Sometimes the storm catches us by surprise. Sometimes we can anticipate its arrival. One thing is for certain -- life will bring storms.

When I began reading this collection of letters and reflections, the metaphor returned to me. Marsha and Jack were allowing those of us in their circle to watch and feel their waves. Each message they sent came from a different moment on their journey through life as it was presented to them. Neither of them, nor any of us, wanted them to have to go through the experiences that the visit of cancer would bring to their lives. Clearly a storm was rising, but no one could see a way of stopping it.

Instead they chose to share all that would surface through this storm, with their friends. They simply chose to not be alone in the storm, to gather comfort and wisdom from those whom they love, and in so doing inspire and awaken us to what is truly important in life.

Those of you who read these letters will have a strong sense of lives rich with friendship and love and wisdom. Marsha and Jack do have a wealth of people with whom they share deep and loving relationships. When the storm rose they were not alone. Each wave that they experienced stirred all kinds of emotion fear, hope, sadness, joy, anger, courage and love. Each time they shared something was awakened in those who they shared with and waves of emotion and strength rose in response. Each wave carried new learning about this lesson called life.

What is important to remember is that these relationships which brought so much comfort and healing in the midst of the storm, were born in much calmer times when the waves were gently lapping on the shore. The richness that we see and feel as we read these letters is available to each of us. Opening ourselves to those around us is a choice we can make every day. Being vulnerable is an option and it seems to me that beauty is the experience that results when we allow ourselves to humbly be seen.

The letters found in this collection will definitely be relevant to those who have been "caught" by cancer. There is much that will be familiar, and this will bring comfort and inspiration. But this is not a book about cancer, this is a book about life. Cancer was the storm that blew into Marsha and Jack's lives, but there are no shortages of storm bringers in life; illness, death, divorce, violence, natural disaster ... the list could go on and on. We can survive life's storms, but if we share and learn through life's storms we can thrive.

Cancer's visit in Marsha and Jack's life has reawakened the knowledge that life is meant to be lived. This collection of letters reminds us that life is meant to be lived ... together. This book shows us how wonder and awe and wisdom and beauty are multiplied when life is shared. It can inspire us to live fully.

This book can inspire us:
to live
to love
to share our vulnerable selves
to celebrate
to "laugh and cry and let the mucous flow"
to create a world where loneliness is the least interesting option available to each of us.